Welcome to Rock & Brews, where you can eat food from the unwashed hands of a man who claimed to have slept with 5,000 women. Please check back frequently, for our menu changes almost every day depending on how much of Paul Stanley's chest hair we have to use as a garnish.
Hors D'oeuvre
Ahi Tuna Sliders Seared By Ace Frehley's Guitar Pyrotechnics / $18
Pop-Your-Cherry Tomato Caprese Salad / $9
Between A Rock And A Chard Place Salad / $9
Plats Principaux
Lick It Up Lengua / $69
A slow-cooked San Antonio favorite served just like
Simmons Sashimi / $69
Razor-thin salmon sliced to the exact dimensions of Gene's mouth penis
Animalize / $69
Animal eyes, unspecified
Eric Carr's Ribs / $23
The actual ribs of replacement drummer Eric Carr
Gene Simmons Family Jewels / $69
Rocky Mountain oysters marinated in two-week aged Manischewitz
Drink
Cold Gin / $7
Detroit Rock City / $11
Motor oil on the rocks
Coffee / $3
Served in a plaster cast
Dessert
Pancake Makeup Flapjacks / $8
Spurs Jesus, please do not throw these at opposing players