Dude Has His Way With a Hot Pocket, Disgust Ensues


Oh, how I hope this is a hoax, but might as well fill you in (pun intended). Thot Pockets or @VERSACEPOPTARTS, an anonymous Twitter and Vine user...had sex with a Hot Pocket this week. Reports say he's an 18-year-old New Englander who works at a seafood restaurant. The saga, which has turned the weirdo into a pseudo-celeb includes several deleted vines (he also screwed a Pop Tart box), a suspended Vine account and a suspended Twitter account. He was also blocked by Hot Pockets before his account was suspended. I've got a few questions: Did he take out the Pop Tarts before screwing a box? Did he eat the Pop Tarts/Hot Pocket after? How long did he microwave the Hot Pocket for? Does he know what sploshing is? What variety did he use? Really hope he stayed away from the Philly Cheese steak flavor which was recalled a few weeks ago.   If you've got a minute, consider taking Buzzfeed's quiz on What Flavor Hot Pocket You Should Make Love To?    


Since 1986, the SA Current has served as the free, independent voice of San Antonio, and we want to keep it that way.

Becoming an SA Current Supporter for as little as $5 a month allows us to continue offering readers access to our coverage of local news, food, nightlife, events, and culture with no paywalls.

Join today to keep San Antonio Current.

Scroll to read more Flavor articles

Join SA Current Newsletters

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.