That's a Wrap

Still got an axe to grind over the fact that your mom didn’t let you see Batman when you were 12? Care for a clandestine peek at the folks who enforce the one-F-bomb-per-PG-13-rating rule? Pop over to the Bijou for some cathartic cleansing and some far-behind-the-scenes gumshoeing, courtesy of Kirby Dick’s This Film Is Not Yet Rated. Pulling from interviews with such presumed “shit-list” frequent fliers as John Waters, Kevin Smith, and Matt (South Park) Stone, Rated purports to be a scathing commentary on and exposé of the MPAA’s arcane ratings board and classification method. Read a sit-down with the film’s director and producer, page 21.

Jon Stewart’s enormous success with The Daily Show is about to pay off in a big, big way — for Robin Williams. Seriously, I’d be pissed. First Carell defects and turns into the biggest thing since Ferrell and Carrey, then Colbert spins off to form a Daily Show lookalike that propels him to the ranks of Time’s Most Influential People. And now, with Man of the Year — wherein the host of a wildly popular political “fake-news” show (hmm … ) is voted into presidential office — Talk-Show Jon gets the snub. Not that Stewart’s got the chops Williams has, but come on — it’s sort of a slap, don’tcha think? Biggest cinematic break Stewart’s caught lately was Doogal. Remember Doogal? No, you don’t.

Ah, finally. Thanks to The Grudge 2, you can once again quiet that jones for bowl-cut-wearing, rolled-in-flour Japanese tykes hiding under your desk at school and doing that openmouthed pop-your-ears-on-the-airplane thing. Look, I’m not saying the little urchins aren’t scary; I’m just saying they’re stupid-looking. And not scary.

So, I don’t know much about Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker besides (1) it’s based on a series of young-adult novels (and by the way, young-adult novel:children’s book::action figure:sissy-ass doll), and (2) it looks like a live-action James Bond Jr. (which may be precisely what they’re aiming for).

Well, I feel like a dope. I was mildly puzzled a few months back when WWE wrestler Kane managed to get himself into a film (the bland-looking See No Evil), and now, with The Marine, I thought it strange that his equally unproven comrade-in-spandex John Cena (sort of a bulkier Marky Mark rip-off) should get the same chance. Come to find out, both pictures were produced by WWE Films, as were The Rock vehicles Walking Tall and The Rundown and something called The Condemned, starring Stone Cold Steve Austin.

Música Cubana, sequel to the well-received Buena Vista Social Club, documents both BVSC star Pio Leiva’s attempts to create a band of young Cuban talent and that band’s search for a unique voice.

More killing, more effete nasal whining, more Harper Lee (Sandra Bullock, this time). Check out Infamous at the Bijou.

High five. Happy mid-week.

Local premiere dates for limited-release films are tentative and can change at the last minute. Please check your local theater listings to confirm showtimes.

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