The Mister Giveth and the Pathfinder Taketh Away

From: Mister Danny Geisler
Subject: ashamed & a shame
Date: August 7, 2006 7:14:01 AM CDT

today has been awful for me.

i watched the flowers in the dumpster during the wind and rain - from 5-6:30-ish - expecting to have the whole thing fall apart. everything survived with no problems. i then visited lilla and the babies for less than an hour. around 8pm i discovered 2 of the flowers had been taken from the main dumpster. one broken off and one, the big orange one, unscrewed, unbolted, and unfastened. my neighbor watched the two young, beefy men take the flowers and put them on top of their silver pathfinder and drive away. i have been told they stopped at la tuna for a beer - WITH MY FLOWERS ON TOP OF THEIR FUCKING CAR. i checked the dumpster all through the night - a small bud vanished and between 3-4am someone tried to take the big purple thistle. in trying to remove it, it fell apart into hundreds of separate purple sticks all scattered on the pavement. it does not look like a thistle anymore, instead it is just a bunch of wooden scraps. trash gone back to being trash.

what a shame.

including the river dumpster, a total of 7 flowers have been taken. most in daylight. some broken off and some detached. the old me would be out there with my chainsaw. the new me wants to set a trap - and catch those silver-pathfinder-driving, beerdrinking, in-broad-daylight, huge-woodenflower robbers.

-danny




From: Mister Danny Geisler
Subject: no offense, but, fuck the world, one person at a time ...
Date: Mon, 07 Aug 2006 09:32:12 -0500

dear friends,

please join me in my special Mondaymorning prayer ... dear god,
and/or the little baby jesus, please fuck everyone, everywhere, all the time, coming and going - `censored` ... if that is too much to ask with such short notice ... then, if not everyone on earth, please fuck the greedy, selfish, spoilers who diminish joy and happiness. especially those, who, all through last night, took 4 of the huge flowers (and destroyed one attempting to UNBOLT it) out of the gladiola-thistle dumpster on the new veltman path at blue star. they made 3 trips. after the 1st hit, around 6pm, the 2 young, beefy, gay-looking thieves drove their silver pathfinder - with the gigantic, 10-foot-tall, 4-feet-in-diameter, bright-orange, wooden flower strapped on top - to la tuna for a beer. shame on them for spoiling what was such a happy and pretty thing. and, by the way, god, give me a goddamn break. when you allowed 2 beefy, beer-drinking, reckless, take-charge, art-collecting, confident, focused young men to drive their suv helter-skelter through blue star - they could have at least stopped by the studio, on the way to their crime, and said "hello mister danny geisler, how's it going? you are indeed a pioneer, we REALLY like your recent work, what are you working on now?, we have previous plans this evening but may we call you another night?, you are soooooooo cute, you can't possibly be a grandfather, gotta phone#?, hope to see you soon ... " this simple "reach around" would have been so easy for you, god "almighty" to arrange. good lord, god, god, god, they were right here - my new fans - and they seem like a whole bunch of crazy all-night fun. jesus christ, jesus, throw me a bone sometime.

Love and kisses, and all the rest is history, mister

`p.s.` if you see any huge wooden flowers around, please let me know. or tell the thieves if they return what has been removed, i will let them take all the flowers - forever - when the installation changes in october - no questions asked.




From: [email protected]
Subject: Dear Miiissssssssss Geisler: Re: Fwd: no offense, but, ___________one person at a time ...
Date: August 7, 2006 11:20:09 AM CDT

Dear Mr. Geisler:

We are sorry to hear that you are having a bad hair day ... AND things were going so well. At the HAPPY Foundation we always try to think happy thoughts. Sometimes when flowers are in a vase too long one has to throw them out. I always tell Jesus that the flowers are coming to him now. I suggest that you put up lost-and-found posters on the telephone poles around the area asking that they be returned. HUGE LOST-AND-FOUND POSTERS. I'm sure those lovely dumpster flowers will turn up and maybe you will find a new husband in the process. Only good can come out of this bouquet art. And then we won't be subjected to your hateful wicked witch of the west side. Just ask yourself, "What would HAPPY do?"

Your Sister

Gene Elder




From: cody williams
Subject: Re: no offense, but, fuck the world, one person at a time ...
Date: Mon, 7 Aug 2006 12:55:25 -0700 (PDT)

Danny,

you should release a statement to the press ... something that will make these two dudes look like what they really are ... assholes. in a strange way it's the biggest compliment in the world ... but, still ... you could slash their tires ... or just make one more flower with something like a live trap for people - and an invoice ... they would be caught and they would have to pay. I'm SURE YOU COULD COME UP WITH A DEVICE CAPABLE OF TRAPPING A PERSON ... just some food for thought.

take care and I'm angry too,

Cody

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