10 People You Meet While Tailgating

Four 'Oh Yeahs' Tailgate at UTSA season opener. Photo by Linda Romero.

San Antonio loves some football, and nothing is better than spending the day getting rowdy with the UTSA Roadrunners. As an avid lover of football, beer, and BBQ, I think we need to throw some attention to the tailgating that's gonna go down outside of the Alamo Dome at UTSA's Homecoming this weekend. Hit me up on Twitter and Instagram if you meet any of these 10 people while tailgating (@MrCJHarper), even if that person is you.

1. The Wanderer

The Wanderer is the tailgater that always seems to be walking somewhere, but never gets to where they’re going. Don’t worry, though, because The Wanderer will always have a beer in their hand.

2. The “Oh, Yeah”

The “Oh, yeah” is a tailgater that loves the music, the booze, the food, and the fun, but they sure don’t know a thing about football. Is that the game where they kick the black and white thing into a goal? The “Oh, yeah” spends their time pretending to know what you’re talking about when you say “fullback” by responding with, “Oh, yeah.”

3. The Master Griller

The Master Griller is the guy or gal who shows up to every tailgating event with their grill in tow. Burgers, dogs, brats, brisket, chicken, you name it, because The Master Griller has already tossed it on the grill. This is the tailgater to know.

4. The Beer Hunter

The Beer Hunter is relentless. He knows his prey. He can smell his prey from a mile away. Once a beer is in his sights he will make a plan of attack. Before you know it, The Beer Hunter is chatting you up and drinking your beer. He is very efficient.

5. The Fan

I love The Fan. He or she is here with one purpose: TO GET ROWDY!!!!!!

6. The Ready to Leave

The Ready to Leave is ready to leave before they even get to the tailgating festivities. They show up in some football garb that they either borrowed or were given during the holidays by an out-of-touch family member. No matter how many beers or brats you throw at them will make them want to stay. Get them an Uber and keep partying.

The Sorority Sisters. Photo by Linda Romero

7. The Human Canvas

The Human Canvas is The Fan, but multiplied by infinity. You can’t tell where the orange and blue paint ends and where their clothes begin. What’s even more impressive is that they don’t let their cool beer make their colors run.

8. The Sorority Sister

The Sorority Sister is actually a good time at tailgating events. She brings a bunch of school spirit, pretty girls, and actually plans on what to bring to tailgate with. Plus, she and her sisters actually bring good beer. As if they would drink Natty Light.

9. The Frat Bro

Refer to “The Sorority Sister”, but without the snacks and add Natty Light.

10. The Local

The Local is the backbone to any sports organization. They know the town, they know the venue, and chances are that they actually know the guys on the field. The Local has a good time and takes pride in supporting their local team. Without The Local there really wouldn’t be a good tailgate.

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