5 Things You Have to Do This Week

Mon 2/17

Gold Series 2: SAY Sí at the Symphony


In collaboration with YOSA, From the Top host Christopher O’ Riley performs Edvard Hagerup Grieg’s beloved concerto Pictures at an Exhibition accompanied by video and media art created by artists from SAY Sí. $16-$19, 7:30-9:30pm Mon, Laurie Auditorium, Trinity University, One Trinity, (210) 737-0097, yosa.org.

Tue 2/18

Mother Nature’s Story Time: Terrific Turtles!


Children ages 3 to 5 are invited to discover the marvelous world of turtles, which come in all shapes and sizes and are unique to where they live. Participants will meet live turtles! Children must be accompanied by caregivers. $5, 10-11am Tue, Cibolo Nature Center, 140 City Park, Boerne, (830) 249-4616. cibolo.org.

Texas tortoise (Gopherus berlandieri) photo courtesy of texasturtles.org.

Tue 2/18

Tuesday Musical Club presents Benjamin Grosvenor

Tuesday Musical Club

Hailed as a “Golden Age” pianist, young British artist Benjamin Grosvenor is internationally recognized for his electrifying performances and penetrating interpretations. $25, 2pm Tue, Laurel Heights United Methodist Church, 227 W Woodlawn, (210) 733-7156, satmc.org.

Tue 2/18 - Sun 2/23

Late Nite Catechism

Late Nite Catechism

Vicki Quade and Maripat Donovan’s “sinfully funny” hit Late Nite Catechism takes audience members back—sometimes nostalgically, sometimes fearfully—to the days of meatless Fridays, school uniforms and justice dispensed with a wooden ruler. The irrepressible “Sister” teaches an adult catechism class to a roomful of “students” (the audience). Over the course of the play, Sister goes from benevolent instructor, rewarding her students for correct answers with glow-in-the-dark rosaries and laminated saint cards, to authoritative drill sergeant. These abrupt mood swings are bound to strike a resonant chord with everyone who survived the ups and downs of going to school, with an omniscient authoritarian at the helm. $30-$35, 7:30pm Tue-Fri, 2pm & 7:30pm Sat, 2pm Sun, Charline McCombs Empire Theatre, 226 N St. Mary’s, San Antonio, (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com.

Wed 2/19



Former coke-dealer/current Miami city-key-holder Armando Christian Pérez often says he calls himself Pitbull because his namesake is “too stupid to lose,” but maybe a better reason is that the much-maligned dog is famous for not letting go once it gets its teeth in you. Even if you’ve never heard of him, even if you’re Amish, just the words “hotel, motel, Holiday Inn” will probably fuck the rest of your day up. Thanks to a Walmart social networking promotion hijacked by internet jokers, even the 6,100 residents of Kodiak, Alaska have not escaped the self-proclaimed Mr. Worldwide’s vise-grip jaw. If you haven’t heard global hits “Timber,” “Culo,” and “Hotel Room Service” played on repeat in the club, you’ve certainly heard them coming out the open windows of passing cars filled with people who look like they’re having more fun than you. $14.30-$224.40, 7pm Wed, AT&T Center, One AT&T Center, (210) 444-5000, sarodeo.com. —Jeremy Martin

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