5 Things You Have to Do This Week

Tue 7/22

Cinema Tuesdays: The Thin Man

The Thin Man

At 80 years old, The Thin Man is a lot like my Nana: elegant, witty and very appreciative of a good martini. And like Nana, The Thin Man is delightful to this day. Most of this is due to the unparalleled chemistry between William Powell and Myrna Loy, who play Nick and Nora Charles; he, a San Francisco detective who “retired” after marrying; she, a wealthy socialite who matches her man in smarts and in drink. What mystery are they solving? Doesn’t matter. The fun’s in watching Nick and Nora trade gibes like they were Wimbledon opponents and then team up to turn their verbal acuity on some unsuspecting chump. $10-$15, 8:45pm Tuesday, Santikos Bijou, 4522 Fredericksburg, (210) 734-4522, tpr.org. —Callie Enlow

Wed 7/23

Tony Bennett

Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett

If Cheek to Cheek, Tony Bennett's upcoming album of duets with Lady Gaga sounds crazy to you, realize your grandparents were equally perplexed in the late 1950s when the already famous Bennett started recording with jazz legends Art Blakey and Count Basie. From his first chart topper ("Because of You," 1951) to his most recent offering (2011’s Duets II, released on his 85th birthday), Bennett—a WWII vet who helped liberate a concentration camp, marched for civil rights with MLK, and has a painting displayed in the Smithsonian—has been a fill-in for Perry Como and a mentor on American Idol, Johnny Carson's first musical guest and Amy Winehouse's last collaborator, all without significantly altering his style or song selection. God forbid he ever actually try to reinvent himself, because America just doesn't make them like that anymore. $51-$126, 8pm Wednesday, The Majestic Theatre, 224 E Houston, (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com.

—Jeremy Martin

Wed 7/23

Rey Lopez Birthday Bash

Rey's Birthday Bash

Hyped as “the biggest show of the year,” promoter Rey Lopez’s birthday extravaganza lures eight RuPaul’s Drag Race alums to the Heat for an over-the-top night of high camp and seasoned lip-synching. Emceed by 2014 Best of San Antonio winner Tencha La Jefa, the gender-bending bash features performances by Season 2 fan favorite Raven (a self-described “bitter bitch” who styles herself as a “mysterious, dark, ice queen”); Laotian queen Jujubee (who enjoys “long walks on the beach, big dicks and fried chicken”); costume designer and insult comic Bianca Del Rio (the series’ first ever Hispanic winner); “overwhelmingly disliked” showgirl Phi Phi O’Hara (who stirred up a heaps of controversy on Season 4); Puerto Rican performer Yara Sofia (who took home the title of Miss Congeniality on Season 3); fellow Boricua Jessica Wild (a choreographer and recording artist who’s collaborated with Mexican superstar Gloria Trevi); SoCal drag fixture Detox Icunt (a member of the band Tranzkuntinental who’s made appearances in videos for Rihanna and Ke$ha); and Miss Gay America 2010 Alyssa Edwards (an accomplished “nailographer” and drag mother of fellow Texan Shangela Laquifa Wadley). $20-$30, 10:30pm Wednesday, Heat Nightclub, 1500 N Main, (210) 227-2600, facebook.com/reylopezentertainment. —Bryan Rindfuss

Wed 7/23

This Is Spinal Tap

This Is Spinal Tap

First in Christopher Guest’s acclaimed list of ensemble cast “improvisational” comedies (followed by Waiting for Guffman, Best in Show, A Mighty Wind, and For Your Consideration), the 1984 mockumentary This Is Spinal Tap chronicles a fictional British heavy metal band touring America tour in support of a comeback album titled Smell the Glove. Through concert footage and interviews with filmmaker Marty Di Bergi (Rob Reiner), the band's dim present and bizarre past comes to light complete with anecdotes about former drummers who died by spontaneous combustion, a bizarre gardening accident and choking to death on the vomit of person(s) unknown. The Drafthouse screens the cult classic as part of The Alamo Goes to 11, a rock-inspired revival series uniting Say Anything (1989), Empire Records (1995) and Velvet Goldmine (1999). $10, 7:15pm Wednesday, Alamo Drafthouse Park North, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 677-8500, drafthouse.com. —BR

Wed 7/23

Helen Hong


Self-categorized as a “comedian, actor, TV host, matchmaker, wingman, enthusiastic karaoke singer and awkward roller skater,” Helen Hong has parlayed her irreverent standup act into an eclectic résumé that includes roles in the Coen Brothers film Inside Llewyn Davis (as Janet Fung) and the animated feature Epic (as the voice of Thistle Lady). $16, 8:30pm Wednesday, Rivercenter Comedy Club, 849 E Commerce, San Antonio, (210) 229-1420, rivercentercomedyclub.com. Through Sunday, July 27.

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