CRITICAL Darling 

Celebrity fashion/gossip blogs are tricky beasts. Don’t read them, especially if you write about entertainment, and you’re out of the loop (Ooooh, so that talentless dimwit got the part because his girlfriend is the producer!). Do read them, and you’re fueling the star-fucking machine, and, for some reason, you find yourself knowing who Lauren Conrad is. Crap — that’s precisely the reason you never got cable.

It’s no secret that a lot of them are mean, too — hit ’em while they’re down kind of places. And even when the general spirit of the site is positive — take popsugar.com for example — sometimes the commenters strike below the belt.

Sometimes they strike a little too close to home.

“Don’t look too pleased with yourself, Zellweger,” reads a comment posted below an image of Renée on jezebel.com, “that ridiculous haircut hasn’t quite grown out yet.”

Sigh; the worst: That’s not just RZ’s ridiculous haircut Scoregasm has insulted — Critical Darling’s locks bear a striking resemblance (but with bangs). Suddenly feel eerie connection with Zellweger. Like, even more than during Bridget Jones’s. Want desperately for her to succeed. Wait, there’s a name for this, perhaps celebrity-gossip’s evilest side effect: the parasocial relationship. Bother. XO.


More by Ashley Lindstrom

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