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Ted Cruz Gets Shitty on Twitter Again, Mocks the Idea of Paying Families During the Pandemic 

  • Wikimedia Commons / Gage Skidmore

For the love of all things holy, could someone please pry Sen. Ted Cruz's cell phone away from him? At least until the pandemic is over.

As his constituents fret over losing their jobs, health insurance or even their goddamned lives, Tweetin' Ted keeps spending copious amounts of time engaging in online shit-flinging contests with celebrities, fellow lawmakers and, well, anyone else who will pay attention.

Today, the acerbic Texas Republican apparently couldn't resist getting in a dig worthy of the junior high lunch table at senate colleague Ed Markey, D-Massachusetts. Markey's offense? Suggesting that Uncle Sam give everyone in the country $2,000 a month to ride out the pandemic's unprecedented economic hardships.

"Why be so cheap?" Cruz tweeted back. "Give everyone $1 million a day, every day, forever. And three soy lattes a day. And a foot massage."

Apparently in no mood for pubescent towel popping, Markey fired back that the economic crisis is "not a goddamn joke" and that millions of families are facing evictions, food insecurity and loss of medical coverage. "Get real," he admonished.

The flood of responses from constituents and others suggest Markey isn't the only one weary of Ted's tireless and tiresome Twitter tiffs.  

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