That's a Wrap

It’s that time again. Time for Eddie Murphy to multi-task-it-up Klumps-style for Norbit. In this instance, the most in-your-face Murphy is not a nutty professor but a “large Marge,” for lack of a better term. Wish he would’ve invited the rest of the faux-bese shemales club: Martin Lawrence, Nathan Lane, Tyler Perry, Robin Williams and, what the hell, John Travolta (soon to light up the screen as Edna Turnblad in Hairspray). Now that’s a party. Why not make it co-ed with Gwyneth Paltow and Courteney Cox?

Also this weekend (cue menacing music): You know his name. You know his methods. You know his appetites. You, you know, you know his name. You know his name! Look up the number! You know his naaaaame …

... and you’re sick and frickin’ tired of it. Hannibal. Hannibal. Hannibal. Even reading it has you gouge-ready, huh?

Well then, in He-who-shall-not-be-named Rising, witness the boy cannibal in all his budding bloody glory. The H-man is portrayed here by French actor (freedom actor, if you prefer) Gaspard Ulliel. You may remember him from the freedom films A Very Long Engagement and Brotherhood of the Wolf. Rising also stars Rhys Ifans (who, according to the Internet Movie Database, was apparently attached to one of this week’s DVD releases,The Science of Sleep, at one point). Oh, and that guy from The Wire is in it, too.

I think it’s safe to say I’ll be staying in.

— Ashley Lindstrom

 

Local premiere dates for limited-release films are tentative and can change at the last minute. Please check your local theater listings to confirm showtimes.