January 14, 2022

The 25 unwritten rules of San Antonio

San Antonio's a city with its own attitude and its own culture. And San Antonians — at least the ones who stick around for a few years — don't feel the need to make excuses for it. Deal with it, or head out on I-35, pendejo.

So, how do we codify what it means to be San Antonian? There aren't laws on the books. The rules aren't engraved on plaques that hang on the walls of public buildings. You might say being a true San Antonian is guided by unwritten laws. You know, the kind you feel in your heart and wear on your sleeve.

Recently, Reddit users from other cities began asking what the unwritten rules were for their hometowns. Inspired by that idea, we'd like to offer up these 25 unwritten rules of San Antonio. Hell, there are probably more, but let's consider this a starter to the conversation.
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What happens at Fiesta stays at Fiesta.
Photo by Jaime Monzon
What happens at Fiesta stays at Fiesta.
Photo by Jaime Monzon
Breakfast tastes better when it comes wrapped in foil.
Photo via Instagram /  breaking.bread.in.sa
Breakfast tastes better when it comes wrapped in foil.
Photo via Instagram / breaking.bread.in.sa
It doesn't matter that the Ghost Tracks has been debunked. That shit is real.
Photo via Google Maps
It doesn't matter that the Ghost Tracks has been debunked. That shit is real.
Photo via Google Maps
You can raise enough money for any relative's life-saving operation with a barbecue plate sale.
Photo via Instagram / puropinchesa
You can raise enough money for any relative's life-saving operation with a barbecue plate sale.
Photo via Instagram / puropinchesa
You can never watch Selena too many times.
Photo via Warner Bros.
You can never watch Selena too many times.
Photo via Warner Bros.
Talk shit about the city but get pissed if anyone not from San Antonio does.
Photo via Twitter / @AngelaM_10_
Talk shit about the city but get pissed if anyone not from San Antonio does.
Photo via Twitter / @AngelaM_10_
Grudges against those who've betrayed the Spurs have no expiration date. (Looking at you, Kawhi Leonard.)
Photo via Twitter / @BrianRayy_
Grudges against those who've betrayed the Spurs have no expiration date. (Looking at you, Kawhi Leonard.)
Photo via Twitter / @BrianRayy_
Every time you visit an older neighborhood, point out what wasn't there two years ago — and how dangerous it was five years ago.
Photo by Sanford Nowlin
Every time you visit an older neighborhood, point out what wasn't there two years ago — and how dangerous it was five years ago.
Photo by Sanford Nowlin
Big Red is the only acceptable beverage to enjoy with barbacoa.
Photo via Instagram / sanantoniostephanie
Big Red is the only acceptable beverage to enjoy with barbacoa.
Photo via Instagram / sanantoniostephanie
Watch your speed through Windcrest.
Photo via Instagram / windcrestedc
Watch your speed through Windcrest.
Photo via Instagram / windcrestedc