July 13, 2019

The Most Ridiculous Laws in Texas

Texas is known for having some shit-show politicians and pieces of legislation. Putting aside political differences coming from either side of the spectrum, here are some serious WTF laws that make us wonder how they even came about.
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Be courteous about your neighbor’s garbage.
The next time you want to eat your neighbor’s garbage, be sure to get their permission first. If you don’t, you could serve jail time.
Photo via Flickr / Tony Swartz
Be courteous about your neighbor’s garbage.
The next time you want to eat your neighbor’s garbage, be sure to get their permission first. If you don’t, you could serve jail time.
Photo via Flickr / Tony Swartz
You can’t have a dildo collection.
Sorry, but in Texas, the possession of sex toys is regulated. The Lone Star State has banned the possession of or promoting the use of more than six dildos. Why is six the magic number? We’re not sure, but that’s Texas for ya – it’s a hell of a lot easier to own lots of guns than lots of dildos.
Photo via Flickr / Nik Morris (van Leiden)
You can’t have a dildo collection.
Sorry, but in Texas, the possession of sex toys is regulated. The Lone Star State has banned the possession of or promoting the use of more than six dildos. Why is six the magic number? We’re not sure, but that’s Texas for ya – it’s a hell of a lot easier to own lots of guns than lots of dildos.
Photo via Flickr / Nik Morris (van Leiden)
Get your own cow’s milk – just not this way.
If you had any funny ideas about scoring some milk from a cow you don’t own, just forget about it. It’s illegal to milk another person’s cow in Texas.
Photo via Flickr / aka CJ
Get your own cow’s milk – just not this way.
If you had any funny ideas about scoring some milk from a cow you don’t own, just forget about it. It’s illegal to milk another person’s cow in Texas.
Photo via Flickr / aka CJ
Take the next train.
Prepare to scratch your head at this one. When two trains meet at a railroad crossing, both shall come to a full stop. And here’s the confusing part: neither train shall proceed until the other train has gone. Let’s just assume the lawmakers were on something the day this law was passed.
Photo via Flickr / tengrrl
Take the next train.
Prepare to scratch your head at this one. When two trains meet at a railroad crossing, both shall come to a full stop. And here’s the confusing part: neither train shall proceed until the other train has gone. Let’s just assume the lawmakers were on something the day this law was passed.
Photo via Flickr / tengrrl
You don’t have to attend your own wedding (well, maybe).
If you’re antisocial AF, you don’t have to go to your own wedding. At least you don’t have to if you’re in the military and stationed out of the country. In Texas, you can be “married by proxy,” meaning you can choose someone to represent you at your own wedding.
Photo via Flickr / Tito Perez
You don’t have to attend your own wedding (well, maybe).
If you’re antisocial AF, you don’t have to go to your own wedding. At least you don’t have to if you’re in the military and stationed out of the country. In Texas, you can be “married by proxy,” meaning you can choose someone to represent you at your own wedding.
Photo via Flickr / Tito Perez
You can’t shoot a buffalo.
In most scenarios, you are completely allowed to shoot a buffalo in the state of Texas. The exception? It’s supposedly Texas law that you can’t shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
Photo via Flickr / Michael Whyte
You can’t shoot a buffalo.
In most scenarios, you are completely allowed to shoot a buffalo in the state of Texas. The exception? It’s supposedly Texas law that you can’t shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
Photo via Flickr / Michael Whyte
Make sure to sip your beer the legal way.
This is rumored to be a myth, but plenty of sources claim this odd piece of law as true in Lefors, Texas. So here it goes. It’s supposedly against the law, at least in Lefors, to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing. So you can stand-sit-stand or stand-stand-sit, but you can’t stand-stand-stand while enjoying a cold one with the boys. 
Photo via Flickr / Fetmano
Make sure to sip your beer the legal way.
This is rumored to be a myth, but plenty of sources claim this odd piece of law as true in Lefors, Texas. So here it goes. It’s supposedly against the law, at least in Lefors, to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing. So you can stand-sit-stand or stand-stand-sit, but you can’t stand-stand-stand while enjoying a cold one with the boys.
Photo via Flickr / Fetmano
Make sure your tail lights are on your horse in Texarkana.
Texans love riding horses, but doing so at night in Texarkana is potentially illegal. You can only be a law-abiding horse rider if you put tail lights on your horse if you decide to go for a midnight stroll. Don’t ask us how this one is supposed to work, ‘cause we’re just as confused as you.
Photo via Flickr / lucathegalga
Make sure your tail lights are on your horse in Texarkana.
Texans love riding horses, but doing so at night in Texarkana is potentially illegal. You can only be a law-abiding horse rider if you put tail lights on your horse if you decide to go for a midnight stroll. Don’t ask us how this one is supposed to work, ‘cause we’re just as confused as you.
Photo via Flickr / lucathegalga
Flirting is potentially illegal.
If you’re trying to land a partner in San Antonio, be careful how you go about it. It’s reportedly a big no-no to “flirt with the eyes or hands” in San Antonio. This goes for both men and women, in case you were wondering. Not to figure out how else you’re supposed to flirt...
Photo via Flickr / STANDARDBLANC.COM
Flirting is potentially illegal.
If you’re trying to land a partner in San Antonio, be careful how you go about it. It’s reportedly a big no-no to “flirt with the eyes or hands” in San Antonio. This goes for both men and women, in case you were wondering. Not to figure out how else you’re supposed to flirt...
Photo via Flickr / STANDARDBLANC.COM
Respect the dead – by watching your mouth.
“Have some respect for the dead” is taken very seriously in Texas. It’s law that using profanity in front of a corpse is illegal. We wonder how this is checked if you’re alone with a corpse, but maybe it’s better if we don’t know.
Photo via Flickr / Lorraine Ann Flack
Respect the dead – by watching your mouth.
“Have some respect for the dead” is taken very seriously in Texas. It’s law that using profanity in front of a corpse is illegal. We wonder how this is checked if you’re alone with a corpse, but maybe it’s better if we don’t know.
Photo via Flickr / Lorraine Ann Flack