Firebrand U.S. Rep. Chip Roy (left) wants to make Elon Musk’s disastrous DOGE a permanent Washington fixture. Credit: Shutterstock / Philip Yabut (left) and Joshua Sukoff (right)

Assclown Alert is a column of opinion, analysis and snark.

Remember the good old days when San Antonio-Austin U.S. Rep. Chip Roy just made headlines by saying outrageously stupid shit?

Sadly, as the far-right blowhard has gained power in Washington, he’s now grown his résumé to include filing lots of bills packed with outrageously stupid shit. Which, you know, is a far more dangerous prospect.

Take, for example, Roy’s recently filed House Resolution 3733, the Make DOGE Permanent Act. And, yes, would do exactly what it sounds like — make Elon Musk’s reckless dismantling of crucial government programs a permanent thing.

“DOGE lifted the hood of federal government spending and put on full display the massive programs and inefficiencies wasting American taxpayer dollars,” Roy wrote in an email to constituents touting his proposal. “Billions were splurged on waste, fraud, and abuse — but also on programs that clearly do not align with the core values of the American people.”

Roy went on to brag that his legislation would give Congress “permanent and effective tools” to root out the waste and fraud Musk kept claiming infected the federal government from top to bottom.

In reality, DOGE was a shitshow under Musk, and it’s hard to imagine Congress wielding similar unchecked power any more responsibly. Indeed, while blowing sunshine up his own bill’s ass, Roy neglected to mention that lawmakers already have tools at their disposal to investigate potential fraud and abuse and can vote to cut off funding spigots that are wasting taxpayer money.

Musk overpromised on the waste and graft he assured us he’d hastily and effectively root out. First, he said it could slash $2 trillion from the federal budget, then revised that number downward by half. Shortly before the billionaire departed Washington for the safer confines of blowing up rockets and talking trash on his own social media platform, he declared that he’d saved Americans all of $160 billion.

But given Musk’s propensity for bluster and bullshit, even that final number is open to question, according to experts. Indeed, nonpartisan research and advocacy group Partnership for Public Service ran the numbers and determined that DOGE’s slash-and-burn tactics won’t save anything this fiscal year, instead setting it back by $135 billion. Oops.

“Musk’s DOGE team has repeatedly inflated its cost-saving efforts, at times posting erroneous claims about ending federal contracts that they later deleted,” the New York Times wrote of the richest asshole in the world’s brief tenure as a “special government employee.”

Roy’s an assclown of the highest order for wanting Congress to continue shambling down the costly, painful and irresponsible path Musk blazed.

Subscribe to SA Current newsletters.

Best of San Antonio Nominations are Now Live

Assclown Alert: Pining for the bad old days of DOGE with Texas Congressman Chip Roy

Sanford Nowlin

24 San Antonio-area parks and greenways with amazing hiking and biking

The price tag to buy San Antonio Spur Tony Parker’s mansion has dropped by nearly half

This San Antonio century home for sale was once lifted on jacks to add a new first floor

San Antonio women-owned restaurants and bars everyone should try

Related Stories