It’s not hard to get by in the Alamo City, but there are certain things you should never do here. Put down Selena or the Spurs, for example, or admit you’re just not a fan of breakfast tacos.

If you desire a stress-free life as a San Antonian avoid these 25 terrible decisions, and don’t say we didn’t warn you. 

The Alamo City comes in 6th place for Travel + Leisure’s list of best cities in America. Credit: Shutterstock / Willowtreehouse
Keep necessities in stock so you don’t panic-raid H-E-B when there’s bad weather It’s a San Antonio tradition to join the hordes descending upon H-E-B when there’s a grim forecast. Instead of fighting the crowds, try keeping some basic necessities in stock and reduce your stress when the storms roll in. Credit: Photo via Unsplash / Brittani Burns
Go to Chacho’s after 2 a.m. While good for late night tacos and nachos, Chacho’s is also known for being pretty shady at night (don’t @ us). Stay out of trouble and hang out somewhere else. Credit: Michael Karlis
Selena is overrated. Credit: Shutterstock / Lisa T Snow
Watch future NBA stars at a Spurs home game It’s no secret that the hometown Spurs are in the midst of a lengthy rebuild. But sucking isn’t necessarily a bad thing. The Silver and Black are loading up on first-round draft picks and building a team around promising young players. Fans also can watch future stars including Jeremy Sochan and Keldon Johnson develop before they become household names. Credit: Courtesy Photo / San Antonio Spurs
Say anything about Austin is better than San Antonio Think Austin is better? Then why are you here? Credit: Shutterstock / Roschetzky Photography
Miss your exit – especially if it’s when you switch highways Miss your exit in some parts of town and you’ll have to go another few miles just to turn around. Credit: Shutterstock / Moab Republic
Use the porta-potty at Fiesta If you’ve gotta go, you’ve gotta go. But avoid using a porta-potty at all costs. Credit: Jaime Monzon
That Charles Barkley is so funny! Credit: Wikimedia Commons / Chensiyuan
Try to explain “inside/outside the loop” to someone not from San Antonio Some people just won’t get it. Credit: Shutterstock / Alexander Lukatskiy
Keep a stockpile of allergy meds year round Oak. Ragweed. Mold. Mountain cedar… San Antonians with allergies just can’t catch a break. Best to keep antihistamines on hand at all times. Credit: Photo via Shutterstock / Pelle Zoltan
Disrespect Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili or David Robinson Talk bad about Timmy and you’re automatically on everyone’s shit list. And if you dare say a bad thing about Manu or David, you’re dead to us. Credit: Wikimedia Commons / Zereshk
Try to be anywhere on time during rush hour If you need to get anywhere between 6 and 9 a.m. or 4 and 7 p.m., do yourself a favor and plan for an extra half hour on the road. And if your trip includes the 281/1604 interchange? Well, patience is a virtue. Credit: Shutterstock / 4kclips
Claim Yolanda Saldivar is innocent You can’t defend the indefensible. Credit: Photo via Twitter / say_daisyyy
You can’t blame Kawhi Leonard for leaving the Spurs for a real team. Credit: Wikimedia Commons / Jose Garcia
Believe that everyone will stay calm and collected when it rains or gets cold If there’s water on the road, San Antonio drivers become twice as reckless. And if snow’s in the forecast? Expect H-E-B to be a warzone. Credit: Shutterstock / LeManna
Not get chicken-on-a-stick at Fiesta Sure, some local restaurants offer chicken-on-a-stick year-round, but at Fiesta it just tastes different, you know? Credit: Jaime Monzon
Make an impromptu trip to Brackenridge Park on Easter A spontaneous springtime stroll at the park is always nice, but if it’s Easter Sunday you might want to make other plans, because crowds of holiday celebrants are camped out there. Credit: Courtesy Photo / Brackenridge Park Conservancy
Wait ‘til the last minute to order your seasonal tamale If you’re skipping the tamalada this year, then get your orders in early. Credit: Shutterstock / Gabriela ZZ
Driving through a yellow light in Leon Valley. Credit: Photo via Google Maps
On the receiving end of a chanclaAbuela came here to kick ass and chew chicle and she’s all out of chicle. Credit: Shutterstock / Chizhevskaya Ekaterina
Grab your seatbelt without looking during the summer. When you hop into the car anytime between June and August, you’d better check and make sure you don’t grab the metal buckle, or else you’re looking to get burned. Credit: Shutterstock / Artit Thongchuea
Donkey Lady Bridge You can’t live in San Antonio long without hearing a version of the story of the Donkey Lady. The story goes something like this: In the 1950s, a young woman attempted to save her children from a house fire (that some say was lit by her husband) — but failed. The event left her horribly disfigured, with her fingers and toes melted together to create hoof-like nubs and her head warped into an elongated, donkey-like shape. Afterward, she was banished to live in the woods. Ever since, the Donkey Lady has roamed the woods of Bexar County, crying out for her children and generally pissed off. Want to meet her? It’s said if you stand on a stone bridge in the Medina River Greenway and call her name three times, she’ll appear. Credit: Photo by Michael Karlis
Think I-35 will ever not be under construction SA’s growing pains seem neverending. While there’s traffic-snarling construction all over the Alamo City, I-35 is particularly notorious for closures and construction. LIke clockwork, when one big project on I-35 ends, another new section of highway is already getting ripped up. Credit: Photo via Google Maps
Wear a Lakers jersey You’re prettymuch asking for a fight if you rep the Lakers. Credit: Wikimedia Commons / NBA

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