Like many U.S. cities, San Antonio got its own custom Monopoly board in 2021. While the game features plenty of recognizable landmarks — the Alamo, River Walk and Japanese Tea Garden among them — many Monopoly-worthy locations didn’t make the cut.

So, we came up with our own version of San Antonio Monopoly, with a list of properties we think belong on the game board — and gameplay suggestions to boot. Sorry if we got a little snarky. It was hard to resist. 

San Antonio is home to the World’s Largest Cowboy Boots. Made by the larger-than-life artist Bob “Daddy-O” Wade, these boots were installed at North Star in 1979 and officially made it into the Guinness Book of World Records as the World’s Largest Cowboy Boots four decades later. Credit: Photo via Shutterstock / MACH Photos
Frost Bank Center – $500 Floor tickets for the Spurs game were worth it to see Wemby in the flesh, but you get caught in a snarl of traffic leaving the stadium. Lose a turn. And pay the bank $200 for the tickets. Credit: Courtesy Photo / Frost Bank Center
NIOSA – $20 You stacked your beer cups one too high and threw up by the porta-potties. Lose a turn and pay the bank $50 for your unused food and drink tickets. Credit: Jaime Monzon
H-E-B Plus! – $150 You picked up this week’s groceries, refurnished the living room and got your flu and COVID shots in a single trip. Skip ahead three spaces. Credit: Shutterstock / Moab Republic
CPS Energy – $275 A string of hot days has CPS begging residents to reduce energy use since the state grid is held together by chewing gum. Lose a turn while you sweat it out at home. Credit: Courtesy Photo / CPS Energy
King William – $1,000,000 You nab a home in the beautiful historic neighborhood, but get corralled in by First Friday crowds. Lose two turns. Credit: Shutterstock / Adam Stocker
USAA provides insurance and financial services to military members, veterans and their families. Credit: Courtesy Photo / USAA
Credit: Nina Rangel
Hit up the Pearl’s ever-expanding farmers market 312 Pearl Pkwy There’s no shortage of farmers markets around San Antonio, but the Pearl’s is centrally located and continues to grow, attracting a variety of vendors selling delicious products. You’ll find fresh and flavorful items ranging from fresh produce to regionally produced wines to artisan food items. Credit: Courtesy Photo / Pearl
Fred’s Fish Fry – $10 You search for evidence it’s a drug front, but don’t find anything. Lose a turn while you eat a seafood platter. No requirement to pay the bank since the meal cost you next to nothing. Credit: Sanford Nowlin
Trying to leave work downtown when there’s an Alamodome concert.That Def Leppard concert just made your journey twice as long. Credit: Shutterstock / 4kclips
The Ghost Tracks
You can’t talk about urban legends in San Antonio without covering the Ghost Tracks. This long-dispelled myth is still a local favorite, and has repeatedly been voted Best Urban Legend in the Current’s Best of San Antonio poll. As the story goes, you can park your car at this spot on the train tracks and get “pushed” forward by some spectral helpers. As a bonus, if you put flour on the back of your trunk, you might even see their little handprints. The push purportedly comes from ghosts of children who met an untimely end in the early 1900s when a train rammed into a bus at the location. However, in 2003, archivist Matt DeWaelsche traced the story’s origin to a 1938 bus accident in Salt Lake City, Utah. Even worse, the tracks were “exorcised,” if you will, by a construction project. When Union Pacific added a second track to the intersection, they leveled out the elevation, removing the downward slant that vehicles would gently roll down when they were supposedly being “pushed” by the ghosts. Turns out it was just a trick of physics the whole time. Credit: Photo via Google Maps
Majestic Theatre 224 E. Houston St., majesticempire.com Featuring Baroque, Mediterranean Revival and Mission Revival architecture styles, the iconic Majestic Theatre is a must-visit even if there isn’t a show going on. As the city’s oldest and largest atmospheric theater, the Majestic, which opened in 1929, has a lot of history. It was the first theater in Texas to be completely air-conditioned. Films have been screened and made their premiere here, and some scenes have even been shot within the historic building. Credit: Photo by Mike Hume, courtesy of the Majestic Theatre
Kiddie Park – $25 Get the most out of an unlimited ride wristband and wear out the kiddo. Move ahead a space. Credit: Courtesy Photo / San Antonio Zoo
Whataburger – $15 Grab a combo from the drive-thru and move ahead three spaces while you refuel. Credit: Shutterstock / Moab Republic
One of the consultants linked to Project Marvel did the initial forecasts for the city-financed Grand Hyatt. Credit: Shutterstock / Ceri Breeze
Credit: Oscar Moreno
Henry B. González Convention Center – $225 Pay $50 to the bank to cover the Convention Center’s $325 million expansion, then pay $10 per turn thereafter. Yeah, that’s a lot of money, but it was San Antonio’s biggest-ever capital improvement project, so deal with it. Credit: Shutterstock / 4kclips
Blue Star Arts Complex – $50 Give back what you collected from the bank this turn since you were in such a hurry to get to First Friday that you forgot to cash your paycheck. At least you got there before it was too mobbed to move. Credit: Courtesy Photo / Contemporary at Blue Star
San Antonio Botanical Garden – $75 Collect $10 from the bank for attending a class on how to save money by growing and foraging for your own food. Lose a turn after hallucinating from those weird-looking mushrooms you found in the backyard. Credit: Courtesy Photo / San Antonio Botanical Garden