Editor’s Note: Every Monday through Thursday, the San Antonio Current posts news in haiku form. We call it Haiku News. Every Friday, however, we publish news in limerick form. We call it Limerick News.

There once was a candidate named Beto
Whose rugged looks were no secreto
When taking a knee
We may disagree
But we all deserve respecto

Ellen DeGeneres Want to Meet O’Rouke After Viral Video on NFL Protests

There once was a publisher named Pecker
Whose tabloid could use a fact checker
He played catch and kill
With his hand in the till
Then became the White House homewrecker

AP: National Enquirer Hit Damaging Trump Stories in a Safe

This article appears in Aug 22-28, 2018.

Sanford Nowlin is editor-in-chief of the San Antonio Current. He holds degrees from Trinity University and the University of Texas at San Antonio, and his work has been featured in Salon, Alternet, Creative...