News

Assclown Alert: Chip Roy high fives colleagues after passing the budget bill he called ‘garbage’

Few love ‘garbage’ more than Oscar the Grouch — except Roy, a congressman who represents San Antonio and Austin.

by Stephanie Koithan July 4, 2025July 9, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Crusading against the demon weed with Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick

The lieutenant governor claimed without proof that Texas smoke shops are being operated by foreign terrorist organizations.

by Michael Karlis June 23, 2025July 23, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Pining for the bad old days of DOGE with Texas Congressman Chip Roy

Despite DOGE’s record for creating chaos and failing to find waste and fraud, Roy filed a bill to make it permanent.

by Sanford Nowlin June 10, 2025July 5, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Banning THC for the sake of political theater with Texas Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick

If you’re angry about the state’s pending ban on THC-containing hemp, look no further than Patrick.

by Sanford Nowlin May 28, 2025June 23, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Spreading anti-Muslim bigotry with Texas congressional candidate Valentina Gomez

Gomez is the same bigot who posted a clip of herself pretending to execute a migrant and staged an on-camera LGBTQIA+ book burning.

by Sanford Nowlin May 13, 2025May 28, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Peddling Bibles amended with Christian nationalist propaganda with David Barton

The Texas-based pseudo-historian wants to sell your mom his own special version of the Good Book.

by Sanford Nowlin April 28, 2025May 28, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Suppressing the vote with U.S. Rep. Chip Roy

The Austin-San Antonio congressman’s SAVE Act would disenfranchise millions of U.S. voters.

by Sanford Nowlin April 21, 2025March 8, 2026

News

Hurling insults like a middle school bully with Texas Congressman Troy Nehls

Nehls posted a two-minute video melting down over Tim Walz and Beto O’Rourke visiting his district and called both men ‘radical left lunatics.’

by Sanford Nowlin April 1, 2025April 16, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Forcing Christianity down Texas school kids’ throats with State Sen. Phil King

King’s Senate Bill 10 would require the Ten Commandments to be posted in every public school classroom.

by Sanford Nowlin March 18, 2025May 25, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Cowering before the anti-vaccine crowd with Texas Gov. Greg Abbott

The governor has said next to nothing about the state’s worsening measles outbreak and still hasn’t urged anyone to get jabbed to slow the spread.

by Sanford Nowlin March 4, 2025March 8, 2026

News

Assclown Alert: Smirking along with Ken Paxton as Trump shits all over Texas

The Texas Attorney General had two big chances last week to protect the state. He blew both of them.

by Sanford Nowlin February 18, 2025May 14, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Puckering up to the Great Orange Leader with U.S. Sen. John Cornyn

Cornyn has dragged himself to new lows of bootlicking subservience to Trump.

by Sanford Nowlin February 4, 2025March 8, 2026

News

Assclown Alert: Making false claims based on a ‘gut feeling’ with incoming ‘border czar’ Tom Homan

Homan claimed without proof on Fox News that the New Orleans and Las Vegas attacks were directly connected.

by Sanford Nowlin January 7, 2025March 25, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Bragging about Texas’ dismal funding of public education with Gov. Greg Abbott

The Lone Star State ranks 37th in the nation in per-student spending and 42nd in per-student funding.

by Sanford Nowlin December 20, 2024February 9, 2025

U.S. Rep. Chip Roy, who represents part of San Antonio's Northside in Congress, is no stranger to spewing inflammatory right-wing rhetoric.

News

Assclown Alert: Conflating rape and sexual indiscretion with U.S. Rep. Chip Roy

Roy, an Austin-San Antonio congressman, made the remark while defending Trump nominee Pete Hegseth.

by Sanford Nowlin December 10, 2024January 22, 2025

News

Promising hellfire and damnation to non-Trump voters with Texas preacher Kenneth Copeland

The pastor said Jesus has a special punishment waiting for anyone who voted against Trump or didn’t bother to vote.

by Sanford Nowlin November 26, 2024July 28, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Losing again and again with now-former Democratic Party chair Gilberto Hinojosa

Wins for Texas Democrats have been few and far between under Hinojosa’s leadership.

by Sanford Nowlin November 12, 2024April 15, 2025

U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz is big mad at Tucker Carlson.

News

Assclown Alert: Playing dumb about abortion bans with U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz

Cruz is trying to stay mum about abortion amid a tight race, but a court filing shows just how extreme his views are.

by Sanford Nowlin October 29, 2024March 25, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Ginning up hurricane conspiracies with the MAGA crowd

The far right can’t figure out whether they want to blame Helene and Milton on God’s wrath or weather machines.

by Sanford Nowlin October 15, 2024March 26, 2025

News

Assclown Alert: Stumping for Trump with JD Vance and Texas evangelist David Wallnau

Vance joined Wallnau, who once claimed Kamala Harris ‘used witchcraft,’ on tour to help Trump win in ‘demonic strongholds.’

by Sanford Nowlin October 1, 2024April 28, 2025

Don't Miss Whiskey Business at the Witte Museum on Aug. 21. Buy tickets now!

Assclown Alert

Assclown Alert: Chip Roy high fives colleagues after passing the budget bill he called ‘garbage’

Assclown Alert: Crusading against the demon weed with Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick

Assclown Alert: Pining for the bad old days of DOGE with Texas Congressman Chip Roy

Assclown Alert: Banning THC for the sake of political theater with Texas Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick

Assclown Alert: Spreading anti-Muslim bigotry with Texas congressional candidate Valentina Gomez

Assclown Alert: Peddling Bibles amended with Christian nationalist propaganda with David Barton

Assclown Alert: Suppressing the vote with U.S. Rep. Chip Roy

Hurling insults like a middle school bully with Texas Congressman Troy Nehls

Assclown Alert: Forcing Christianity down Texas school kids’ throats with State Sen. Phil King

Assclown Alert: Cowering before the anti-vaccine crowd with Texas Gov. Greg Abbott

Assclown Alert: Smirking along with Ken Paxton as Trump shits all over Texas

Assclown Alert: Puckering up to the Great Orange Leader with U.S. Sen. John Cornyn

Assclown Alert: Making false claims based on a ‘gut feeling’ with incoming ‘border czar’ Tom Homan

Assclown Alert: Bragging about Texas’ dismal funding of public education with Gov. Greg Abbott

Assclown Alert: Conflating rape and sexual indiscretion with U.S. Rep. Chip Roy

Promising hellfire and damnation to non-Trump voters with Texas preacher Kenneth Copeland

Assclown Alert: Losing again and again with now-former Democratic Party chair Gilberto Hinojosa

Assclown Alert: Playing dumb about abortion bans with U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz

Assclown Alert: Ginning up hurricane conspiracies with the MAGA crowd

Assclown Alert: Stumping for Trump with JD Vance and Texas evangelist David Wallnau

Colorful San Antonio century home known as ‘The Dollhouse’ is for sale

An eclectic Victorian for sale in Lavaca was built by the Lone Star Brewery’s architect

Everything we saw as Underøath brought the intensity to San Antonio

This San Antonio hacienda for sale has two patios overlooking its backyard pool oasis