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The Internet can't stop mocking Ted Cruz's tight pants and moose knuckle

Texas' junior senator apparently dressed to impress on a recent trip to Mar-a-Lago.

By Sanford Nowlin on Wed, Feb 14, 2024 at 1:44 pm

Wikimedia Commons / Gage Skidmore

U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz smirks from the stage at a 2019 event hosted by conservative group Turning Point USA.

As much as U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz likes to sphincter snorkel Donald Trump, you'd think he'd have put on his best-fitting new suit when he got an invite to Mar-a-Lago — the reality show star-turned-president's Florida residence — over the weekend.

Instead, Texas' junior senator showed up in a blazer and pants that fit his frumpy frame like not unlike an overstretched sausage casing. A photo shared online by the X account PatriotTakes suggest that Cruz's tailor must have used extra-durable thread to fasten the button onto the jacket. Beyond that, the pic suggests he's got less shame than a '70s rockstar when it comes to showing off his ... ahem ... package.

The dual wardrobe malfunctions were first reported on by news site Queerty, which issued the following warning for those with weak hearts or stomachs: "You’ll have to click the tweet to see the full image. Don’t say you haven’t been warned."

Don’t zoom in. Ted Cruz’s pants are way too tight. pic.twitter.com/hSv6plpdBF
— PatriotTakes 🇺🇸 (@patriottakes) February 11, 2024

Naturally, plenty of folks out in Internet Land failed to heed the warnings. Many of those who did went on to lob "moose knuckle" and "cameltoe" jokes, not to mention jabs about Teddy-Boy's attempts to pull off a blazer that might have fit better 20 pounds ago.

Here we go:

I’m sure all the ladies were in awe of his camel toe
— Renegade Cowboy🐾🐾 🌊⚓️🌊🐾🐾 (@Rene_gadeCowboy) February 12, 2024

Ummmmm… ewww pic.twitter.com/UPc3eAYzE2
— Jo (@JoJoFromJerz) February 11, 2024

That suit button is doing a LOT of work. pic.twitter.com/OwuzgeW4Bv
— Moog (@a_toots) February 11, 2024

It's like telling Trump not to look at a solar eclipse, it's gonna happen despite the recommendation, with a similar result.
— Tim (@Trendy_Tim) February 12, 2024

The courage and grit on display by that coat button is remarkable.
— Ryan Isenberg (@tagg94) February 12, 2024

He’s going to take out the person taking the pic if that button pops…
— Qi Ji 🐧🐥🐼🏖⚾️☀️🌻🇺🇦🙏🏻 (@vogelgiebhaber) February 12, 2024

That's not a camel toe. That's a whole moose knuckle.
— Jools 𝕏 (@a_swift_half) February 12, 2024

He got that WAP
— Nikita 🍔 (@nykyt0sha) February 12, 2024

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